Nervous System Work
How it Works
We are designed to be in a state of rest and digest. Ideally, stress here and there helps us grow. However, in today’s complicated world of increasing technology, higher prices and urgent demands, with less and less ways to resource and slow down, it’s getting more difficult for our nervous systems to maintain an optimal state of enjoyment. Our bodies wind up holding more and more responses to threat, which can manifest as anxiety, depression, pain and illness. We need to be more conscientious to build in support for our nervous systems to thrive.
The word emotion literally has at its root “e” meaning outward and “motion” meaning movement. Our emotions are meant to move out of our bodies and inform us of our needs. But when they can’t move out because we feel ashamed, or need to keep a stiff upper lip, or don’t feel safe, or don’t have time, they remain undigested in the body. People come to therapy, not just for what’s happened to them, but for what still lives in them from what’s happened. It’s the trapped emotional and physical pain that we often need help with.
We won’t get too far in talk therapy if your nervous system isn’t working for you. Part of the work we will do is learn how to work with your nervous system. We will go over how to resource — engaging in activities or practices that allow our nervous systems to calm down from panic or sharpen from states of dissociation, without causing us harm. External resources could be things like: taking a walk, petting a furry friend, sipping a cuppa, doing yoga, for some it’s even listening to death metal. Whatever makes your system feel calm but alert. Internal resourcing are skills you could in a deprivation chamber like box breathing or tapping into soothing memories that allow your body to feel as if you’re there. I’ll ask you to practice resourcing multiple times a day for a couple minutes at a time so that you get it into muscle memory — that’s how you have access to it when you really need it, when you’re panicking or checking out and you need to be calm and present.
What to Expect
What you might notice at first is that your mind might find it strange to slow down. It will come up with all the “to-do’s” you could be doing instead or that phone call you don’t really need to make right now. But as you practice patience with a curious attitude toward your body, you will find that you will access states of peacefulness, and sometimes states of stress that your body is ready to release. You may notice your body twitches, jerks, or falls asleep. You may feel like you’re floating in the womb or feel a rush of adrenaline that your body had stored. All of these responses are natural and part of the process. For a period of time, some people may notice symptoms increase as the body digests the stress hormones associated with releasing trauma. But for many, it simply feels blissful. Over time, this work results in your nervous system recalibrating to increase it’s tolerance of what you can handle well, leaving you more resilient to stress and better able to rest. You may notice: less insomnia, feeling more rested, more focus, less irritability, and more ability to maintain states of pleasure for longer periods of time.
Scenario: “Annie:” From Insomnia to Sleep!
Annie came to me desperate and ready to pull out her hair. She had bags under her eyes and trouble remembering basic words at times. Because she was in her late 60’s, she felt most doctors were ascribing her symptoms to normal aging, and were not taking her signs of distress seriously. She could barely put one foot in front of the other. She hadn’t been sleeping well, some nights not at all. She had been struggling with PTSD symptoms that were actually increasing, even though she had left her abuser a few years ago.
We started with nervous system work and helping her set goals to clean up her home. The first night after nervous system work she finally slept! She was so grateful she cried tears of joy. The second night, she woke up at 5 o’clock in the morning, but still better than the pattern had been. After our second session half a week later, she slept through the night and woke up feeling rested for the first time in as long as she could remember. She also noticed that some symptoms of incontinence had resolved. After several sessions, she continued to ground her nervous system. Annie was able to resource and move through the trauma she had not been ready to process. She started thriving in her life, made new friends, got back to the art she loved doing and was able to show up for people and work in meaningful ways.
